This week I have had a couple of clients chat with me about fear.
The fear of leaving.
For both of them, leaving their jobs, or not leaving them, or not just yet, or what’s the best way?
These are really hard decisions to make, and a very important thing to realise when we face a choice of such magnitude is that it doesn’t really matter what you choose.
It doesn’t really matter which path you take.
The best way, is the way that you choose.
When we choose, we start to move energy. We might realise we don’t want to quit yet. Great! Get back in there!
We might realise the things we are really afraid of - not being supported is usually the crux in one of many forms - people will think I’m an idiot, I’ll run out of money, I’m a loser if I don’t have a job…. and so on
Who or what are you trying to please or appease??
Fear = Future Expectations Appearing Real
Cute, sure, but also pretty true a lot of the time (tigers in the grass excepted).
You’ve got yourself this far. You have supported yourself this far (even if it was messy), and your support of yourself is the key - making a choice turns that key, so to speak.
one path will be longer
one will be shorter
one choice will be easier
one will be more harrowing.
one will bring more ease
one more challenge
and it may not be in the obvious ways, or the ways you expect. What looks good or easy up front may not pan out the way you expect or hope. That means time for new choices!
And you wont know until you make a choice and take a step.
Stay in the job/relationship/city that is killing you slowly (or at any speed…) as it bleeds your soul dry.
At some point something will happen - you will get fired, the company will collapse, the economy will fry, your body will manifest disease - migraine, flu, metabolic issues, cancer, the list goes one when cortisol is driving you.
If you are like Nat you will break your ankle to get out of selling insurance, if you are like me you will fire yourself (yes, I have done that, technically I retrenched myself when soul-dying in my for-the-good-of-the-family Sydney office job so I could move to Brisbane and go full time in yoga. No, I didn’t have the money, I used the NEIS program. I moved to QLD and went on the dole ha ha, very much taboo in the world I grew up in!).
I even took myself hostage once in Hong Kong when I needed better support in my job (children’s learning-through-play teacher). I must be an awesome negotiator, they doubled my pay and promoted me to program director - a skill set that is behind the all that I do today.
Then: teaching infants-preschoolers about embodied concepts of colour, movement (stop, go, up down etc) and language. I learnt to catch and be in my body along with them.
Now: in not-exactly-yoga we have been revisiting early developmental movement patterns - yield, push, reach, grasp & pull - that all play out via our nervous system in how we move, think and interact in the world. This is embodiment.
The benefit of this as adults is we re-organise and retune our nervous systems for deeper interactions and healthier connections with self and others.
It is pretty awesome, and gently powerful. You move and breathe differently and your world begins to recalibrate, while your nervous system down regulates. Sweet.
From that place, your frontal lobe can come back on board and you easily make better choices. Choosing is easier with a healthy nervous system and mental state.
When we are in fear, the brain shuts down, our vision narrows and decision making is near impossible. Breathe differently. Move differently. Make a choice. See how it feels. Follow through or choose again. Rinse and repeat.
You never know how the pieces will come together. I would love to say I knew what I was doing. I never knew what I was doing.
To say I went to HK kicking and screaming is accurate. I got that kids play job (28 years ago) answering an ad that wanted sporty people, I thought, well I just bought a pair of Reeboks, that has to count!).
I mostly know what I can’t do anymore, although that said the better state my nervous system is in, the more programming I unravel, the more I know what I need to do, and the less the fears can drive or trap me.
No, I’m not immune, but I have skills, awareness and experience. I also trust myself, even when I have no idea why.
Need to build self trust?
Lie on the floor and breathe (simple natural breathing, or rebirthing style if you have done your 10 sessions with me)
feel the support beneath you,
know in your body that you have your own back
much love
Briellen
(my big name)
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Here is what’s up next in our world for more love & connection:
SOOTHE - body work that benefits with Natalie | Sat 25 Oct
One space available- a soft & deep day of giving and receiving. Love in action & visible as we dissolve a lifetime of contraction from the body through sliding fascial caps and other hands on techniques that offer resolution and restore flow to your being
LEARN MORE HERE
Radical [ Self Care ] Sunday | Sun 26 Oct - cancelled - See you December 7!
A day to choose you, to choose tend to all-of-you: the easy, the challenging, everything, holding space for all that you are.
Move, breathe connect and deepen in presence with self and community
LEARN MORE HERE
Ready for deep personal shifts, created one-on-one?
Time to rebirth yourself or your life??
I have the lived experience (the essential frequency) AND incredible tools to help you.
(R)evolution, my 1:1 private radical embodied breathwork and life re-write programme exists to support you to rebirth your life exactly where you need it, driven by your inner wisdom.
In this programme you are expertly supported with my hit-the-spot clarity and deep compassion, the process being a deep coming home to yourself.
The healing foundation is clearing of preverbal trauma and other stories held in the body that hijack your brain. We do this via your breath and other de-programming techniques for real change & liberation.
You don’t need to know what is in your way, and this is not talking it out - all you need is an inner nudge (or burning desire !) to change & grow into more of You.
EMAIL ME to find out more and see if this is a good fit for you.
My work is especially for sensitive people who feel stuck and cramped fitting into moulds, for those that have been told “ you can’t do it that way” , who know there is more to life than this, and their next move is creating a life that is truely their own.